Being First!

You met an Asshole early one morning, ok; maybe they are having a bad day. You meet Assholes all day, guess what, you’re the ASSHOLE – Raw Thoughts

In our new age of Instant Gratification where the generation gaps converge on seemingly endless access to the overload and ease of mostly useless information, being first takes a new form, individual survival and can be fun!?

Many would argue a introvert approach of wait and see, not me! Why you might ask. We live in a time where chaos appears in nano seconds; and most every time when analyzed, could have been avoided or at least its impact minimized.

Example – Just about all of my Corrections Friends would agree the importance of always observing to precondition the outcome just moments before the emotional ramp up of an Inmate. Mental or medical conditions aside, most every similar trigger can be managed if we first catch the change of emotions. No secret here. Those that do live it breath it even away from work, part of their persona.

Hey, here’s a veteran secret to maintaining a reaction edge to most every potential bad outcome. SET THE ENCOUNTER!

How? Be the first to say hello, first to acknowledge the other person presence, first to make eye contact… first to SMILE!

Being first this way is an excuse to catch that person off guard where your assessments becomes more sincere. Best part is, what you present is generally what you get in return.

Wishing that all of you had A MERRY Christmas and of course, a personally Outstanding Happy New Year!!

Thanks for being You!!

PS. Wish I could have know first how my Mom and Dad health began to tumble.. they both died with little warning. Health monitoring devise are now available! check it out

Another chance another year…

Wow 2017 has already begun…your plans…are you running or walking?

Some will look back with earnest with exacting adjustments to again meet and sometimes exceed their goals; many will not. Choices we all face? Some say its the choices we make that defines us. I agree but must add, now with the multitude of distractions, making meaningful purposeful decisions has never been more difficult.

It is my hope that your new year will bring the kind of things and experiences that somehow have eluded you in the past. But I dare say, remember the saying about insanity… doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result… or something like that.

This short ditty is a sharing of what a hardheaded me learned about getting and achieving. First, take a quite moment to make an assessment of what you want to accomplish by years end. Group or break it into areas needing attention now. Health, Wealth, Wise are my favs.

Not getting into Goal setting here, too many great programs out there to answer that need. But what I will do is share with you a couple of suggestions that might assist you.

Many fail in their attempts because most do not have in place a method to keep score / or guide posts along the way. I mean, looking back now of what you were able to accomplish for 2016 will not make you happy about any goals set earlier in the year. You must have a way to keep score to ultimately be happy at years end.

Here is a quick way that has worked for me and many others. Using the Health, Wealth, Wise groups. First ID one thing in each that would make you happy that you would complete by years end. Be serious and compelling about this selection. For example, Health – Trade 15lbs of fat with 15lbs of lean muscle to complete my personal best in a 5km. Wealth – Put away in a interest bearing account 3 months or more of my pay for a rainy day fund. Wise – Read 12 Books of which 3 will be work / industry related. After you are comfortable about your new found practice, set more..

Here the magic move. Start a daily journal of which you confess and log your progress in these goals! It will be these moments of self talk and reflection captured incrementally (daily jotting of your thoughts) that will keep you on track. All the books I have read detailing the interviews of the highest achievers do just that, they keep a journal!! I must add, goals setting notes is just a line or two in my daily thoughts, I also capture the many things that had inspired me that day and the hopes of days to come as well..

Now I expect some push back on this suggestion. Go ahead and re-read the insanity line again…


PS. Health minded readers go here:

Time is your Friend??

“My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we have is time.” Steve Jobs

“Time has no meaning in itself unless we choose to give it significance.” Leo Buscaglia

I know many of you have more than one source of income. Maybe another job, working spouse, investment income or maybe even a side business. Takes more than one today doesn’t it?! We also know many that seem to make their life happen on only one. Happiness has many forms. Majority of us want it all; hence the multiple income approach. Happiness is a choice that just takes effort at times.

If you are like most of us, we were raised to believe that you must do well in school, go to college so you can land a good JOB, Right! I have a niece that has already slaved through 21 years of education awaiting selection to a hospital as a Doctor, (Resident); but still has a number of years before she can practice. We counted just recently that she will be in her early 30’s before she has the title of Doctor. A Great salary will of course come with all the hard work. Then many hours a week, some say 80 to 100 for a number of years. So proud of her! Here to tell you, I couldn’t or wouldn’t sacrifice most of my limited life for what our society has sold to the masses as the path to happiness. Trust me, I’m already smartly sharing some options to her.

The basic key to a happy life is to do what drives you and get paid for doing it! Don’t know what that might be for you, just know that if you are too busy working for what you thought was a good job; running out of time to enjoy it becomes the norm. For my niece above, she worries how she can include starting a family while she is still of the age to enjoy it.

Let’s take some personal inventory. Take out a piece of paper and write out the title, Happy Life – Starting NOW! In any format list several key areas that must be addressed: Monthly Income, DEBT Service, Social / Family Status, Retirement Status

Now use Time and Money as the two items that you now have as resources. For example, under INCOME; 160 hours a month, 40hr / week, and $4000, (just example) where you must then subtract total of hours a month, 720, (30×24) minus hours of sleep, 240, (8×30), balance being 320 hours for the balance on the month. Not including travel time to work, emergencies, vacation, taxes, debt service, and other time and money users. Yeah I know, its just math! Now if you did finish through all of the areas a common theme will arise; basically, you run out of month before you truly enjoy your efforts.

The new RICH is having the MONEY and TIME to truly enjoy your life! In most every personal case researched, this new Rich and happy group has made TIME their friend. Each story is unique, but all properly use technology or digital tools to multiple their efforts and therefore their time. Its like having more than 24 hours a day and the money earned every extra minute in turbo drive!!

If I hit a funny bone or just sparked an interest, click on this link:

To your search for Happiness!!

PS: Found a way to keep tabs on your loves ones healthy decisions

Excuses for Living

“Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows.” Michael Landon

The personal quality of Life is placed squarely on one’s decision to experience the thing that seemingly becomes elusive. I mean really. You have X number of days to check off your bucket list, ‘Right’!

The challenging question is, ‘do you even have a bucket?’ Why not?

“Unless you change direction, you are likely to end up where you are headed.” Chinese proverb.

You must know that a full life is without yearning or wishing and hoping that you should have done this or that…invariably mental gymnastics while on your deathbed.

Happiness is that thing that becomes elusive. Been my experience that a person must begin with personal happiness to properly involved others. Funny how attractive a happy person becomes!

The must do exercise is to write out your ‘bucket list’! Some rules or guidance should be to write out at least 100, be in present tense, and saved for future reference. You can write it out on a old school piece of paper or digitized it on your computer or smartphone. No matter just do it!

The other most important thing is to associate a picture that best fits the goal. That way you can better excite your subconscious, your own creative factory. For example, “I own an Island’ picture of island.

Simple right! You know better! It is the decisions that accompany the proper execution of each item, (or new experience), that is the difficult part. For example, those that are contrary to involving a unwilling partner. Like, when you write something like, ‘I dive 100 feet’ or I jumped at 15,000 feet’ or any other event He or She is totally against. Meaning you most likely will have to delete that item. Or just maybe accept the fact you settled to live your life through your partners dreams and desires. A compromise…is to write out a bucket list together… If that makes you happy. My guess it will not.

Most of us go through life not knowing what we want… but feeling darned sure we don’t have it!

Make quality decisions now do not wait and begin to live a full life!!

Know that you are one quality decision away from real happiness! Stop lying to yourself and sharing your excuses with others now!

Expect only the best from yourself. I know I am!

If you are currently trading time for dollars and running out of month before realizing that your job ain’t cutting it; be sure to sign up for my free boot camp for some proven ideas.

“What You’ve Been Thinking”

“Most People Lead Lives of Quite Desperation” Henry David Thoreau

As we grow older each of us become more aware of how mortal we are as we take personal inventory of experiences vs. wishes yet realized. The search for a level of happiness has always been the rule. Are you at a personal level of happiness or have you settled? Abraham Lincoln said, “You are as Happy as you make your mind up to be” Here is a challenge that will shed some light on your current journey. Take a blank piece of paper and draw a large T at the top allowing to form a list left and right. The left caption would be “What I’m currently thinking about Now; while the Right would be, “What I am Thankful for Now.

If you are the normal person the right side would be a short list while the left would be must longer. For example, Left side 1. Be sure to pay the Mortgage on time; maybe on the Right, Live in a Free Country. Here is the kicker. Ask yourself how much of your ‘thought time’ have you given to either side? I would venture to say you spend more time of the left side list of items. I mean really, why spend some time thinking about what I am Thankful for? I already have those right? Should I not worry or make plans to take care of what I feel are the pressing or important things in my Life right now?

The true test is how you feel when you think about the items on your list. What feeling does it evoke? Worry, Frustration, Love, Thankfulness?
I mean have ever wondered why some people have all the luck and happiness but not you? Do you realize that what you have been giving attention to by thinking about it constantly; you give life to it. You know, that mistake you made in school, what you shamefully did to your friend, that item you stole, time you was a bully. Past events of choices you regrettably made as a young person. The question is why are you still giving life to it? You know that you cannot change those bad decisions you made now right? Oh, you kept them in reserve so you can draw them out as a learning experience. Nonetheless, those bad decisions are subconsciously in your present experiences again, same bad feelings and all. For example, ever wondered why all your bitching and disgust about the lack of money has not made you any wealthier..

Hopefully I have to not been too rough on you, just know I have also taken the same inventory of what I have been thinking presently as well. For fun try this technique that is easy to execute as well as rewarding. In the next 30 to 60 days from this post date let’s check results. Write out five things money related that you would like to have completed. For example, 1. I, (your Name), enjoy my new job making over $50,000 a year! 2. I, (your name) enjoy having an extra few dollars to take my spouse out to dinner on Fridays!…etc. These five will be your ‘Daily Affirmations’ where you will speak out loud 15 minute upon awaking every morning, last few minute before you fall sleep and sometime midday. The trick is to dilute what you have given as truth to your subconscious, “the worry of money” to that of good expectations of what money will do for you now. To turbo boost this approach be sure to write these out at least three times in that same day period. Silly right??! No, if you think a moment, you have already done this. You verbalized your lack of money constantly, you have written out the numbers on a piece of paper adding those bills up every pay period or used you smartphone to tally whats left. Your subconscious again does not know the difference, it is there to create what you have as a image in your mind. An image made vividly clear with a constant energy of thought.

Now as a final note, One more crucial step must be taken, one that the masses have failed to do and why this has not worked for them. Described above is so you can be in the receive mode of the things, lifestyle, etc.; that you now have given life to through tailored subconscious instructions. Secret that is lost is that you must first Give before you Receive!! Using our money test, here is what is best. Anytime you receive money,(net pay, money found, etc.), give some away. A 1% to 5% will suffice. The process is that of Flow. This procedure is that of a positive flow vs. negative.

Using these two in the next 30 to 60 days will change your outlook on life. “Try, there is no try only Do” Yoda, Return of the Jedi.

Wishing you the best of you always!

Raising the Dead?

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones”

Confucius The Analects

I have found that the biggest challenge to living a happy life is the attention we give to the past. You see, when you think or give attention to some event that is dead and gone, you then give life to it in your present. Not to say that we each do have memories worthy of proper attention. It is just we should do a better job at deciding what we importantly think about.

In a past life I would meet young incarcerated men on a daily basis as a Case Worker. These men ran the full gamut of petty thief to mass murder convictions. Many were of the self harm vs. staff harm variety. In more than 9 out of 10 cases, Inmate behavior emulated that of a wild monkey prior to calming down. I found it always interesting to question each on the reasons for their behavior, especially after their exhausting yelling and pounding, (some cases, severe self harm), episodes.

In all “monkey behavior” cases each had intense concentration of an emotional past event. So much so that they relived the event all over again. Many of us do just that and do not realize the harm we bring into our lives.

Controlled thinking was a technique borrowed from those with specialized degrees and can also benefit those of us who in many ways are just one angry tirade away from incarceration. If I remember correctly, you would write down on a piece of paper, so later you could reuse in times of need; two categories, troubling thoughts and thankful truths. On the left side would be the troubling thoughts and on the right side would be the latter.

For example, Troubling – failed marriage; Thankful – loving brother, sister, parents. Invariably the truth of what we take for granted in our lives is what truly matters and how useless the act of dwelling on things we have no control over not only waste precious time but also causes so much useless pain.

Being aware is the start of change!

PS.  You ever wish you could have save someone you love from an unhealthy lifestyle?  New wearable Health Monitoring devise is the answer Helo

JOB = Just Over Broke

I remember when Mom’s job was to stay home while Dad was the one that worked, you know, the breadwinner. Wow have times changed! I know I am dating myself, but one income was all that was needed. If you are like most people today you have not one job but two or more; and if a couple, they have two or more as well. Hard to wrap yourself around this ‘prescribed solution’ while each of us hold on to some possible good news on the horizon. I remember what Dad had made reference to, in one of my many counseling sessions, this time on changing my current behavior; “Son, you will never change your behavior until it hurts enough” Using one definition resource: Wikipedia. defines that “behavior is the range of actions and mannerisms made by individuals, organisms, systems, or artificial entities in conjunction with themselves or their environment…It is the response of the system or organism to various stimuli or inputs, whether internal or external, conscious or subconscious, overt or covert, and voluntary or involuntary”

Dad went on to say that for me to change I have two choices, one was to listen to his advise and shape up now or he will beat it out of me! The true understanding did not come till later in life to be: Only two ways to change ones belief system, one is through a constant exposure to the new system, idea; the other was SHOCK. Experiencing shock is reaching beyond your PAIN threshold or hitting ones true bottom.

Does it hurt enough?

RAW Thoughts

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